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Who can stand to watch the Watchmen?

Debbie Schussel calls it depraved.

Kyle Smith calls it brilliant.

Barbara Nicolosi walked out.

John Nolte likes it and Movie Bob thinks it may be better than The Dark Knight.

A friend went to see it during its opening weekend; she was utterly confused. Meanwhile, her daughter walked out. I’ve finally seen Watchmen and I think it may be brilliant. Hard to say, though.

I’ve read the Alan Moore graphic novel. This gives me an advantage over the average viewer, but I think anyone paying attention can easily follow along. The problem for the average viewer, though, is that they’ll go in expecting to see another comic book, action hero thriller, e.g., Iron Man or Spider Man. Surprise, it ain’t!

Let me get some negatives out of the way. Watchmen reaches new depths of excess. One of the things I found truly imaginative about The Dark Knight was how it didn’t show us things. It was stuffed to the eyeballs with violence, but blood didn’t spray across the screen, we didn’t see bones jutting from ripped flesh, and – watch real close – you did not see a pencil go into a man’s eye. All of these things were heavily implied, but we were spared the gory details.

Watchmen revels in the gory details, including, but not limited to, sprays of blood, ripped flesh, jutting bones, seared flesh, people burning alive, and, oh, the random bullet to the head.

This isn’t really surprising. Director Zack Snyder is merely showing us his horror roots (Dawn of the Dead) and repeating himself (300). He needs to get out more. Too much is, more often than not, simply too much. It’s a valid argument that sometimes restriction (i.e., a production code) can often force imaginations to work overtime to produce genius. Here, Snyder does the gross-out thing because, well, he can. Whoopee.

Most of the actors are weak, especially given the weight they need to carry. This is made all the more apparent by two stand-out performances – Jeffrey Dean Morgan as The Comedian and Jackie Earle Haley as Rorschach – and one near-stand-out, Billy Crudup as Dr. Manhattan.

And really, this is where the film turns for me. When I read the book, I was captured by the pure no compromise nature of Rorschach and here, on screen, it’s captured perfectly. Haley is pure genius, someone who has more menace in his detached, calm stare than most have in their snarls. Who couldn’t be chilled when he warns both prison guards and prisoners: “None of you seem to understand: I’m not locked in here with you. You’re locked in here with ME!” He’s matched only by how the Comedian smiles as he annihilates people.

And the Comedian isn’t in contrast as a variation on the theme. Where Rorschach’s view of the world turns him into an inflexible vigilante, with no sense of compromise even in the face of Armageddon, the Comedian becomes an amoral one. When either character is on the screen, it’s amazing. You are forced to view the extreme possibilities of what life would be like if a caped crusader actually walked among us. Where The Dark Knight shows us the degree of moral conviction you would have to have, Watchmen shows us the results if you don’t. These are costumed vigilantes gone insane.

The film is inconsistent in spots, almost ridiculous, but then, so is the source material. For all of the ideas Moore wanted to put into his story, he didn’t understand some basics about American life or politics. In the film, the actors who play Nixon and his entourage are ludicrous, almost as bad as the concept of Nixon getting re-elected five times. I never once believed the world was heading toward nuclear annihilation. The only way you’d fall for the setup is if you believe Nixon was evil. Moore obviously does, and the film is faithful to that vision. Too faithful. (Nice recreation of The War Room from Dr. Strangelove, though.)

Eventually, though, Rorschach comes back on and all is well. By the film’s climax, I was sold. The changes made to the book’s end work perfect in context of the film. By then I’d forgotten about the excess guts and gore, the silliness of Nixon, and even the weakness of the other actors. I was left with that look on Rorschach's face as he confronts Dr. Manhattan, that pure human cry matched against a force detached from humanity.

This is a dense film, filled to the brim with ideas wrapped in excess. If a film may be measured with how it haunts you after you’ve seen it, then Watchmen is very successful, because I find myself thinking about it still. This will be an instant own on DVD so I can dissect whether it really is brilliant, or merely the next step down the road of depravity, a new low in bread and circuses.

Ironically, I suspect that Rorschach would say the latter.

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