Skip to main content

Iowahawk, Sewer Side Chat

Iowahawk, Sewer Side Chat:

Questioner
Hi, I'm Josh Markin of the ESU Progressive Student Alliance, and I'd just like to say that as a campus activist for peace and justice, that I am totally down with how you have stood up against the fascist neo-Jew GPA thugs at A E Pi, and their plans for busting every grade curve on this campus.

Gromulak
Moje vznášadlo je plné úhorov Gromulak! Pun jegulja loma-làn!

Interpreter
These words please Gromulak! Continue your tribute, Hu-Man!

Questioner
Awesome! But I do have one problem. Warren continues to blame you and the mutant community for the sewage explosion that destroyed Baxter Hall in 2005, even though all the evidence points to an inside job! For example, did you know that sewage doesn't burn? Why did A E Pi have advanced warning? And what about the damage to Rec Building 7? All the facts are in this pamphlet! Why won't you come out and tell the truth that you are innocent, and that Warren's thugs blew up Baxter so he could plant illegal monitoring devices at the sewage pit, and jail mutants without a warrant, and...

Gromulak
Mia kusenveturilo estas plena da angiloj skeertuig is vol palings, loma-làn! Lije k'o iz kabla R'Qqharbok!

Interpreter
Your words grown tiresome like vines of cess algae, Hu-Man! Feast now on his pallid flesh, minions!

Questioner
Whoah! Don't eat me bro! Aaaaah! AAAAAAAH!!

 ROFLMAO!

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Not the Hero We Deserve, But the Hero We Need

The Dark Knight is the best film I’ve seen in years. Not just the best “superhero” film, but the best film of any type. It’s not perfect, not quite a masterpiece, but it’s flaws are, to me, tiny and overwhelmed by the time the film ends. While relatively bloodless, it is consistently brutal, not just in what it depicts but in the themes that drive it. TDK is a film for adults, please leave the kids at home. Let’s deal with those “flaws” first, the largest being the character Rachel Dawes . In Batman Begins , I blamed Katie Holmes . Her acting was weak, to say the least, which is regrettable in that who she is and what she says and does are important to the film. Critics agreed and either for that or other reasons, Katie was replaced by Maggie Gyllenhaal , who is a better actress. Yet here she’s weak, real weak. Maybe it’s the character, not the actress, which is frustrating because Rachel is a pivotal character. The film,...
1 comment
Read more

John Wick: Chapter 4

No sense in playing coy, this is a great film. I’ve seen it twice and while I don’t quite love it in the way I love the first, original John Wick , it’s my #2. It’s a little overlong, has some wasted space and time, has one absolutely pointless and useless character, and generally ignores the realities of firefights, falling, getting shot, hit, etc. All that notwithstanding, it’s a great action flick, has a genuine emotional core, and is well worth your time if you’re into that sort of thing. Like I am. Summary: John Wick (Keanu Reeves), last seen saying he was fed up with the High Table, goes to war to obtain his freedom. Some of the most incredible action scenes ever filmed ensue, culminating in a very satisfactory finale and a devastating post-credit scene. The first Wick film was a surprise hit. It was a simple, straight-forward tale of vengeance told in a simple, straight-forward manner. Where it stood out was its devotion to human stunt work, on exploiting long camera shots that ...
Post a Comment
Read more

Super 8

Part of the reason I blog at all is to maintain some practice with writing. This hasn’t worked well since by the time I’m done with the work day, I never want to type again. But there’s this old manuscript that wants to finish its digital conversion (from analog Smith-Corona original to digital Word) so that I can revive the 1988 published novel ( Derelict , ah I remember it fondly). And then I can polish the new one, and get on with the next one. Kindle, I have stuff coming to Kindle! In the meanwhile, I’m not sure what to make of Super 8 . I know, it’s been out a few weeks already, but I don’t want to write about Transformers: Dark of the Moon because it was just loud and silly, the motion picture equivalent of a decent Fourth of July fireworks display (i.e., all flash, less than zero substance). So I took a moment to catch Super 8 and I’m left with this overall feeling of meh . It is by no means a bad film, it’s just...lacking. Super 8 is J.J. Abrams’ homage to Steven Spielberg, ...
2 comments
Read more